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Monday, July 27, 2009

R.I.P Zeus

On Monday July 20th, I lost my baby, my bestest friend....my dog Zeus. Words can't even describe how much heart ache and pain I have been in....I was so close to him. I was not fully prepared for this...but then again, can you ever really prepare yourself for death?

Zeus was a very special dog....one of a kind, with an amazing spirit. My little buddy....he was always so happy & hyper....he had so much personality and was *SO* loyal to me.

He was 6 weeks old when I got him and his brother Skully, and he was just shy of 11yrs old when he passed. I am so devastated by this, I feel like there is a huge hole in my heart. That dog has been with me through many ups and downs in my life. When I was sad he knew it...he would give me a ton of kisses, bump/push me with his nose, bring me toys....he would not stop until he made me smile. Its very tough...nothings the same without him here...it all just sucks so bad.

About 4 months ago Zeus & Skully were running down the steps like maniacs....Zeus slipped and fell down a few steps. This all just inflamed his arthritis to where he needed weekly injections to ease the pain. A month after his whole demeanor changed completely. Everything he did was at half speed, drooled alot, ate and drink as if he was drugged. The meds he was on wouldn't have had this affect ......My vets and I believe he had a stroke. So since then Zeus has been in the vet almost weekly taking tests to find out what we could do for him. Even though he was at half speed, he fought it and put on a happy face and wagged his tail the entire time....he refuse to show me that he was in any pain. On Monday morning July 20th....we believe Zeus had another stroke and/or heart attack.

I miss him *SO* much....I can't seem to shake my sadness. Mornings and nights are the worst for me....I cant really wake up or go to bed without crying....everything's so different. But I know this is how it goes...I know I hafta mourn. I know our animals have a short life span and I know eventually this pain will ease and I will have only happy memories. Its just hard to see all that through this thick cloud right now. I am so grateful that I had the luxury of spending his entire life with him....if feel very blessed for that. ...and I am at ease knowing that baby is not in pain anymore.

If you're a member of my site and have watched my VBlogs (Video blogs), then you know that right before Zeus's death, I have also been dealing with some other personal issues in my life. When it rains, it pours....ugh all this shit is just way to heavy for me. So I'm just trying to take everything one day at a time and piece my head back together. My mom had also been here all week...as soon as she heard the bad news about Zeus she flew in. She knows how much he meant to me...my whole family and all my friends who knew Zeus, are all upset. I miss him and his intoxicating happy spirit.

I have been putting most of my focus on Skully as well. He too is mourning and its so upsetting to watch. Right after his brother passed, he kept going to the spot where he died and sitting in it, sniffing it. He wouldn't eat, would not get out of bed in the morning, just really mopey.
So I took him to the vet and got him on some anti-depressants. I've also been taking him to the dog park daily to play with other dogs....this all seems to be lifting his spirits, which makes me smile.

I do want to say thank you, to all of you who have reached out to me about Zeus. When I finally turned on my computer and saw all the emails, FB comments, twitter replies, etc....I was shocked... I'm so grateful. Please know that I read all of them and your support really means alot to me...so a huge thank you.

Thats it for now....sorry for this blah blog post....just not a happy Lex right now. I'll come around....at my own pace.
Hope you all have a great week. xoxox


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Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Lexi,
Do not apologize "sorry for this blah blog post". For I'm sure you have shed as many tears as words you've posted, if not more, of you're loss. Let them flow to make you feel better if it helps.

July 27, 2009 at 12:08 PM  
Anonymous Peedy said...

I am sorry to hear about your losing of a close pet and friend. I know what its like to become so attached they are like a family member. Over time the pain will heal but just know that your beloved Zues loved you just as much and he is in a better place now. I wish you the best.

July 27, 2009 at 1:29 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


Definitely do not apologize for this post!! You have every right to feel the way you do. Plus, sometimes writing things out helps some too. I know Zeus knew that he was loved more than words can say .... and also that you were the best Parent that he could have ever had!! You take as much time as you need, that's only normal.

Mercedes ~ xoxoxoxoxo

Here's a Poem that I found online.

(In memory of beloved pets who are gone, but not forgotten.)

I stood by your bed last night, I came to have a peep. I could see that you were crying. You found it hard to sleep.

I whined to you softly as you brushed away a tear, "It's me, I haven't left you, I'm well, I'm fine, I'm here."

I was close to you at breakfast, I watched you pour the tea, You were thinking of the many times your hands reached down to me.

I was with you at the shops today. Your arms were getting sore. I longed to take your parcels, I wish I could do more.

I was with you at my grave today, You tend it with such care. I want to re-assure you, that I'm not lying there.

I walked with you towards the house, as you fumbled for your key. I gently put my paw on you, I smiled and said "It's me."

You looked so very tired, and sank into a chair. I tried so hard to let you know, that I was standing there.

It's possible for me to be so near you everyday. To say to you with certainty, "I never went away."

You sat there very quietly, then smiled, I think you knew...in the stillness of that evening, I was very close to you.

The day is over... I smile and watch you yawning and say "Good-night, God bless, I'll see you in the morning."

And when the time is right for you to cross the brief divide, I'll rush across to greet you and we'll stand, side by side.

I have so many things to show you, there is so much for you to see. Be patient, live your journey out... then come home to be with me.

- Author unknown

July 27, 2009 at 3:01 PM  
Anonymous Jake said...

Not a blah post at all. Still remember my best friend who passed at 14 y/o. You are so right that eventually there is nothing but happy memories left.

Very happy that you have so much support. Plus you supporting Skully by taking him to the dog park. Sounds very therapeutic to you both.

Stay strong Lexi.. xoxo

July 27, 2009 at 6:06 PM  
Anonymous BmoreDoug said...

I am so sorry to hear about Zeus. I just went though the same with my family pet. Our pet was a 12 yr old bull mastif and it was just due to old age and he just did not have any quality of life. Our local ASPCA took care of the end but while we were there, we rescued another dog who is our new love.

July 29, 2009 at 12:28 AM  
Anonymous Lexi Lapetina said...

Thank you sunny, peedy and mercedes.

Thank u BmoreDoug and I'm so sorry for your loss as well :(

xoxox Lexi

July 29, 2009 at 10:17 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ditto on the not being a blah blog post, Lex...It's real, it's life...that is what makes you and your site so special...
Dogs teach us so much about life...how to love, how to nurture, how to be loyal, how to be silly and have fun...but with their short life spans, they also teach us how to say goodbye (at least for now!).

Sending you my best, Lex.
a distant admirer

July 30, 2009 at 8:54 PM  
Anonymous Lexi lapetina said...

Thank you Dark

August 3, 2009 at 9:38 AM  

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